Andrea, President of the Student Council
by Shiva-J
Summary: Andrea is elected the President of Lawndale High's student council... May God have mercy on their souls...
1. Andrea, President of the Student Council

**Andrea, President of the Student Council**

As the black-clad Gothic nightmare stared down the group of squeak clean kids, with all the telltale signs of happy thoughts, answered dreams, and more money than sense.

Andrea just sneered at them while idly swinging her gavel in the air with a lacy gloved hand.

"So," she spoke after doing this silently for a few minutes, "Everyone thought it would be _soooo_ funny to vote for the weird Goth chick, thinking that theirs would just be a joke vote."

Andrea's sneer grew, one of the nameless members of the council wet himself.

"Well guess what? If you get enough votes then it ceases to be a joke."

Andrea's sneer melted into a dark smile, the kind the denied the basic goodness of her fellow man.

"And for my first act..." Andrea drawled as her gaze fell on Jodie, "Could you be a dear and bring them in?"

Jodie nodded and rose and went for the door, everyone one else wondered what the hell was going on.

Oh, and why Jodie was taking being made Vice-President in such stride.

Ms. Landon opened the door and those other two weird girls came in, wearing their green and red coats and combat boots.

The one with glasses seemed to smile, but it was hard to tell.

The other one however _was_ smiling, and everyone but Andrea and Jodie wished she wasn't.

"My fellow members of the Student Council," Andrea said with dark glee in every syllable, "It is time... to begin to bring Lawndale High to its end."

Andrea then waved those two weird girls forward and said, "And with Daria and Jane's help, we will _win!_"

Andrea, those two weird girls, and Jodie began to cackle madly like evil witches from those old fairytales.

The remaining members of the council joined their nameless colleague in pissing their under garments.


	2. The First Week in Andrea's Term as

**The First Week in Andrea's Term as President of the Student Council**

_Monday_

Coach Morris was found in her office swinging from a ceiling fixture with electrical cord cutting so deeply into her jugular that the first responding paramedics discovered that it had in fact cut into the flesh and was embedded so deeply that the funeral parlor where she wound up left large chunks of it in and just covered it with flesh colored makeup.

* * *

In Ms. Barch's Science class a very small red light could be seen in the center of the classroom's clock, but everyone who saw it assumed it had something to do with Li and her security apparatus and dismissed it out of hand.

* * *

_Tuesday_

The Landon's manse near (but not IN) the Crewe Neck was visited by two ambulances when Andrew and Michele Landon suffered twin strokes after being given the 'reasons you suck' speech from their eldest child, Jodie Landon.

While they ultimately didn't die, the Landon parents were permanently bedridden and physical custody of the Landon kids fell to Grandma Landon, who was more than happy to move out of the nursing home her son had lovingly abandoned her in, and move into his place and made the guest bedroom and it's adjacent bathroom her own.

* * *

_Wednesday_

All sorts of juicy gossip was made available to the school gossips when, on top of the madness of an in-school suicide and Jodie Landon quitting all extracurricular activities besides the Student Council...

Those two _weird girls_ were spotted hanging out with two guys known as 'Bob the Punk' and 'Shaggy' that some braver, less popular souls were able to ask questions and confirmed for the popular that yes, they were dating.

Though who was dating who was an open question, and a fun debate topic.

* * *

For some reason Mr. DeMartino seemed specially happy in class, and his smile whenever he looked at Kevin creeped everyone out.  
Even Kevin.

* * *

Tongues were further set on fire when Andrea, that Goth girl that was the President of the Student Council was seen at the pizza place, with local richboy Tom Sloane.

* * *

_Thursday_

Kevin Thompson was absent from school that day, since his father was found on his living room couch dead, having expired due to an apparent heart attack.

Many months later Charlene Thompson would find an empty syringe underneath the living room couch and couldn't for the life of her figure out why it was in her house.

* * *

The students and faculty of Lawndale High got to witness first hand Janet Barch being tasered and dragged out of her classroom after resisting arrest for child abuse by Lawndale finest.

Li was doing damage control all day long.

* * *

Late at night in front of Angela Li's house, a pair of black eyes flashed in the light of an overhead light before vanishing into nothingness...

* * *

_Friday_

Angela Li failed to report for work on Friday, since there was no official Vice Principal, Ms. Bennett was put in control on the basis that she assisted in running the school's budget, while Mr. O'Neill was asked by DeMartino to go check up on the resident tyrant...

* * *

Mr. O'Neill used the emergency hotkey to Angela's house that she had stashed away in her office in case of, well... Emergencies.

Everything in her surprisingly affluent and well-to-do home seemed in perfect order, but it was quiet...

_"AAAAAAAAA!"_ Screamed the voice of an older but still attractive rice-burner.

"Ms. Li?" O'Neill squeaked as he made baby-steps in the direction of the screams, though this was because he crapped himself and he didn't want to leave evidence of his shame on the floor.

"IT'S FROM HELL!"

"AAAAAA!"

"NOM NOM NOM NOM!"

O'Neill found himself outside of Li's master bathroom and with tears falling down his face, fear paralyzing his throat, and his shorts filled with doo-doo feces.

He reached a shaking hand to the doorknob and turned it...

He took one look at what Li was doing and passed out.

* * *

_"...And in the latest twist in the on-going troubles at the local high school. Principal Angela Li was found in her home to have suffered some sort of breakdown and is currently in a rest home pending a psychological examination."_

This terse news report didn't explain how everyone and their mother in Lawndale knew for a fact that Li was discovered in her bathroom covered from head to toe in self-inflicted cuts, some of which were bone deep.

And that she was now fond of using laxities to crap in the toilet and then eat it, and scream "IT'S FROM HELL!" over and over again.

* * *

_Saturday_

O'Neill stared in a mirror and recited as he had for the last ten hours solid, "You are a happy person. You are a happy person. You are a happy person."

No one believed him, not even himself.  
"hehehe...uh hm..."

"wuh, wuh... wuhWAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

* * *

Everyone else in Lawndale enjoyed themselves during the weekend to various degrees, except for Andrew and Michele Landon since they were 'recovering' from their strokes.

* * *

Kevin Thompson was sitting with his Mom, Mr. DeMartino, Coach Gibson, and some sort of 'shyclopearpist' person and had no idea what was going on.  
But he did understand that if he didn't take the pills he was being given and do tutoring with Mr. D then he wouldn't be able to play football, _and that wasn't cool at all!_

* * *

At an impromptu meeting of the Student Council, Andrea, Jane, Daria, and Jodie were all sitting with their respective boyfriends laughing, telling jokes, exchanging stories, and scarfing down pizza and sodas like it was some sort of party.

The other, nameless, members of the Council were silent as stones, their eyes doing the thousand yard stare, still struggling to reconcile how they thought of themselves as people compared to the things they had done and witnessed during the school week.

And Week Two was just around the corner...

The only thing that got through the haze was the brief, evil smile that graced Andrea's lips when Tom asked her what she had in mind for the rest of her Presidency.

"Oh, I'll think of something." She said sweetly.

The nameless members of the Council voided their bowels in fear again.


End file.
